Oh, internet, sweet internet.  Is there anything more satisfying than shopping online when you have no money and are supposed to be working?

If you are not a fan of shopping (wierdo) you can still build a functional adulty wardrobe without having to deal with annoying mall people. You have to do some leg work first, but it’s totally worth it when the boxes roll in.  I like to order stuff when I’m doing something particularly unpleasant at work because knowing the Box is en route to the office helps me not decide to “work from home.”

First of all, you gotta know your sizes.  Your current, actual sizes. Feet are easy.  Dresses are easy.   Things like jeans and swimsuits are for advanced / brave shoppers only.  Figure out some stores and brands where you are consistently the same size.  J. Crew is great for this because it’s all one brand.  If you’re a 6 tall shirt, almost any 6 tall shirt will fir you.  Try on lots of things. Lots.  Go to places like Neiman Marcus and Saks to try on the good stuff (go to one of the outlets if you feel bad trying on piles of shit you have no intention of buying– outlets are not as fussy).  Eventually, you’ll start to realize that certain brands fit– and some don’t.  I can’t wear Diane VonFurstenburg.  Or shorts.  No shorts ever.

Okay, so now you know you’re almost always going to fit a size 8 US/ 44 IT dress, a 9.5 shoe, whatever.

Once you’re able to confidently select a size and know what’s going to work on your body and in your closet, you can shop online without having to return everything.  Why bother? Because you can get really, really good shit for like 95% less than the stores.  Sales. Consignment.

Come to me Boxes!!!